walked into a cathedral on a boiling hot day and felt the temperature drop 30 degrees. starting to see the historic appeal of the catholic church
— Alison Herman (@aherman2006) April 14, 2024
we really do rewrite history, like why am i nostalgic for that apartment where i was too depressed to get out of bed
— ely kreimendahl (@ElyKreimendahl) April 15, 2024
the first two drinks don’t count if you have social anxiety they just turn you into a normal person
— erica (@ericanextdooor) April 12, 2024
i can’t believe i got the keys to a new house, got a promotion at work and bagged myself a boyfriend all in the space of a week 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 forgot how good the sims 4 is
— dale (@abcdale_) April 16, 2024
Children are so progressive now, I just heard kids arranging a game of house at the park say “should we have a mom and a dad or two dads?” “Two dads…but one is evil.”
— Lucy Huber (@clhubes) April 13, 2024
– No one crosses my mind when I hear a love song https://t.co/3rlLXv3ZOp
— Sholaaaaa 🧘🏾 (@sholawho) April 14, 2024
Sleep Like an Egyptian. pic.twitter.com/gsohyyK9Of
— Paul Bronks (@SlenderSherbet) April 16, 2024
lol – getting pizza slice and the guy in front of me (trying to banter with the cashier) is like “you made mine with extra love right” and the cashier very solemnly and Eastern European accentedly said “it’s made with normal amount pepperoni”
— 🔎Al🔍 (@SweatieAngle) April 12, 2024
It’s a cliché but if I had a time machine I’d go back to when the first cave man was about to invent the wheel and I’d show my time machine. Eat shit you primitive idiot.
— Dean (@dakarrier) April 16, 2024
